Back to China

What are they thinking, are they crazy, isn't 4 kids enough?  I have heard some of these comments and maybe others have thought it so I thought I would let you know how this happened.   Sometime in the spring or summer of 2012, Greg suggested that we might want to add to our family again.  I was not really "feeling it" at the time, but I told him I would pray about it.  I believe my words were, "I would really have to hear a word from God for that to happen."  Which is strange because I had previously been the one that thought we weren't done, but Greg would say, "My quiver is full".  Well, we both prayed and we both weren't sure and went back and forth so we just waited for God to tell us.  My heart gradually started opening up about it and I started occasionally looking at a picture of a waiting child (dangerous!).  I'm not certain how I got on the e-mail list for this adoption advocacy site but it was  either that I was looking at a child that my friend, Jill, was advocating for or it was when I wanted to see the boy that Martha was adopting.  Anyway, one day in October I got an e-mail showing pictures of several waiting children and I watched the video of one of these children and just started to cry.  She was singing a little song and was so precious. I asked to see her file but didn't show it to Greg for a week.  You see, her special need is cerebral palsy and I was pretty sure Greg wouldn't be okay with that SN.  I gave him the paperwork and asked him to pray about her for 3 days.  I never saw him give it more than a glance and so I was pretty frustrated with him, because I was thinking about her constantly and he didn't seem to be giving her a second thought.  On the 3rd day, I asked him what his decision was and he asked me where the papers were. Aargh!  He glanced at them and said, "I don't think so." I said, "Will you please pray about it?".  He came back 30 minutes later and said, "I think we should do it."  And so, the paper chase for Lian QingLe began.